When Good Dogs Go Bad

As I said before, this past weekend was spent primarily in bed trying to recover from sickness. (I'm still sick BTW - can I girl get a break?!)


Sunday evening, I fed the dogs and threw them outside for some evening exercise. While they were outside playing, I hoped in a warm bath hoping to sooth my aches & pains.

I got out the tub, put on my robe and went to the kitchen to make warm tea when Steven asked, "Where are they dogs?" My blissful, lavender filled bubble bath caused me to completely forget about the pups outside. I opened the back door, called their names and nothing happened.

This is highly unusual around our house. Dixie is usually beating down the back door insisting that she be let back into the house after about 3 minutes outside.

So I called their names again....Nothing.....

Slight panic began to creep into my mind.

I stepped out onto the back patio to find the back gate *wide* open. At which point full on panic ensued. People practically fly down the road in front of our home and I was terrified to think what might have happened.....

I screamed to Steven that the back gate was open & the dogs were gone. He bolted out the door without a single word.

I ran frantically to bedroom in search of clothes. Remember....I was sick....like fever sick. Sopping wet from my recent bath - and completely naked. Getting myself dressed & out the door turned out to be a very difficult process.

I couldn't find a single pair of sweatpants or yoga pants. Only shorts. I couldn't find a bra (I swear Dixie hides them from me) So I opted for an over sized sweatshirt and hoped it wouldn't be too obvious. I caught a quick glimpse of myself in the mirror confirmed that I was wearing bright teal shorts, brown Ugg boots, a ratty red sweatshirt with wild wet hair and zero makeup.

I said a silent prayer that I wouldn't encounter any neighbors and ran out the front door screaming for Dixie & Bauer.  As I was running out the door a list of thoughts passed through my mind: How exactly does one issue an "Amber Alert" for missing dogs?  What's the number to the National Guard because somebody needs to get over here ASAP?  If firefighters rescue stranded kittens - who the heck is supposed to find my precious pups?!?!

When I reached the front yard, Steven's truck was gone so I knew he was riding around the neighborhood looking for them.

I turned the corner of our lot and there was Bauer prancing up and down in circles - obviously thrilled to be out of the back yard. Dixie was already in the back yard and sitting quietly on the back deck as if she had never left. It took a few minutes, but I was finally able to coral Bauer back into fence and lock the back gate again.

I waited for Steven to drive by the house and he was relieved to learn they had come home on their own.

Until we got into the house that is.

You see, our lot backs up to a wooded area. We love it because it provides a great deal of privacy. One tiny problem - on the other side of the wooded area is a pasture - full of cows. For the past three years, those cows have tortured my dogs. Every now and then the cows will start moo'ing like crazy and Dixie & Bauer growl & whine while patrolling the back yard begging to be let into the pasture.

So I guess when Dixie & Bauer gained their freedom from fence, they decided it was time to finally pay those cows a visit.

And when they came through the back door, they had the evidence to prove it.

Dixie was covered in cow poop. I mean completely covered. Her nose, paw, chest & legs. Poop everywhere. Bauer had a little on his paws and legs - but it looked like Dixie has found a huge patty and just rolled around in it. Make.Me.Gag.

Because of my sickness, I hadn't been able to smell anything for three days, but I could very clearly smell the stench coming off that dog. So I can only imagine how bad it really was for Steven. I tried to wipe Dixie down as best I could - but the all the commotion left me very light headed and exhausted. Steven finally had to just give Dixie a bath.

I'm so happy they came home on their own - at least I know that they will come back if they get out again. But you just never know what could happen. Of course I had to give Dixie & Bauer a little talking to. Warn them not to go visit those cows anymore. Tell them how much mommy loves them and how sad she would be if anything happened to them.

Having a little chat with the "bad" dogs.  Dixie seems to understand that she's in trouble.  Bauer is probably thinking that he really wants to visit those cows again.  :)