Friday, March 4, 2011

And That's When I Had A Melt Down

I had a difficult day yesterday.

I got into a pretty large, we'll call it, "disagreement" with a friend yesterday.  Out of respect for this friendship, I'm not going to go into details, but let's just say it was the biggest argument I have had with a friend in over years.  I spent a great deal of my morning and lunch break resolving this issue and by 2:00 pm I was *completely* spent.

I was very much looking forward to my evening workout.  I've learned the channel my anxiety and frustrations in my workouts and use them as a means of therapy.  Last night's WOD consisted of double unders & kettle bell swings - I was hoping I would be so physically exhausted by the end of the workout that I wouldn't have the mental capacity to do worry or fret the rest of the evening.

To make a long story short, I hurt my wrist pretty badly two weeks ago doing a move called a "wall climb".  (See HERE for an example.)  I fell and tweaked my right wrist.  Ever since, it will randomly start hurting during a workout.

So of course, last night about half way through my WOD, my wrist started aching.  At first it was subtle and I tried to ignore the pain.  A few rounds later, my wrist was throbbing with every kettle bell swing.  It was impossible to ignore the pain, but I took a quick break and tried to push through it anyway.  I did not want to tap out of that WOD.  So I took another quick break and grabbed the kettle bell - but it was too much.  Each swing felt like my wrist was going to snap under the pressure and I tapped.  I quit - didn't finish - gave up.  Oh the shame......


I grabbed a bag of ice and stewed in my disapointment and anger while I waited for Steven to finish his WOD.  As soon as he was done, I begged him to take me home - icebag in tow.

On the drive home, I felt the frustrations of my day building in my chest.  Replaying the disappointment I had felt earlier in the day.  Throbbing pain in my wrist.  Frustration at tapping out of the WOD.  Stupid icebag that was leaking freezing cold water *all over my lap*.

And that's when I had a melt down.


The sobs started quitely at first.  I felt my bottom lip begin to quiver and I begged the hysteria to go away.  By my efforts were futile and within seconds I was in full on melt down.

Startled to see that I was crying, Steven asked, "Honey what's wrong??  Is it your wrist?  Do we need to go to the hospital??"

To which I replied......

I've....(sob) had.....(gasp) a....bad....(full hysteria) DAY!!!!!  I fought with my friend.  (Tears streaming down my face.)  I tapped out of my WOD.  (Voice rising)  I've broken my stupid wrist.  I'm never going to be able to workout again.  (Sob - gasp - sob) And that's going to make me sad.  (Tears)  And then I'll start eating my feelings again.  (Snot running down my face.)  Which will make me get fat again!!!  (Full on panic!)  AND this damn ice bag is leaking all over ME!!!!!!!!!

I could tell by the frightened look on Steven's face that he knew we had reached defcon 5.  We were quickly approaching a melt down which could rival the scuba incident of 2009.  I could see the wheels turning in his mind as he tried to determine the best way to talk me off the ledge.  (He later confirmed that he was trying to figure out where the closest fast food restaurant was with a good strawberry milk shake.  See even my husband knows I eat my feelings!)

After a minute or two of silence I regained composure.  Steven encouraged me that it was okay to tap during my WOD because I was hurt.  I need to listen to my body and understand when enough is enough.  That doesn't make me weak or less of a CrossFitter - it just means I need a break.

Thank God for a husband who is quick on his feet and can calm a girl down when she's at her worst.  :)

And yes, I fully realize that I may have been slightly melodramatic during this melt down - but during the moment all I could envision was myself thirty pounds heavier, with my wrist in a cast and stuffing my face with salt & vinegar chips for the rest of my life!

So I'm taking a rest day today and allowing my wrist (and my soul) a day to recover from our melt down.  I will leave you with this video - as proof (mainly to myself) that I'm not a total whimp and that I can push myself and should not be discouraged by one bad WOD or one fight with a friend.  Everybody has bad days.....



CrossFit Charlotte: "The Hill, A Team Thing" from Boomer Alred on Vimeo.

This is a video from our WOD last Saturday.  It's kind of hard to tell who I am since it's in black and white.  Got a ponytail and a gray shirt with black yoga pants.  I'm the one with the big grin while running with the sand bag - Lord only knows why!

31 comments:

Samantha said...

I hope your day is sooo much better today! Relax. Take a hot bath. Do some yoga. :)

xo

Samantha

Greer's Gossip said...

I am sorry you had a bad day yesterday!!! It seems that when one thing goes wrong, everything goes wrong. Why is that?

Hope you have a wonderful, relaxing weekend!!!

Christina said...

I'm sorry you had a rough day yesterday. I hope that you and your friend work things out soon and your wrist heels quickly! I hope today is much better for you! It's so close to the weekend :)

Aly @ Analyze This said...

Today is a new day!!! :) That's the beauty of life. We have a bad day, and we make tomorrow (or today for you) a better one!

I hope your wrist is OK and you can just relax!

I agree with Samantha up there ... take a nice, hot bath! :)

Enjoy!

Ashley said...

awww I'm sorry you had such a rough day yesterday. Sometimes a day off is what we need and it does NOT make us weak.
I hate melt downs like that and feel a little silly once I realize how dramatic I was haha =) Keep your head up girl and good luck with your friend situation!
Happy Friday!

Ashley said...

So sorry to hear that you had a terrible day. I hope that today is 100 times better.

It doesn't hurt to let it all out, it's likely exactly what you needed.

Take care of your wrist and all will be well soon.

x

Cait said...

oh hun- i know how that goes- i had a melt down the other day and honestly- i felt so much better just letting it out and crying. you'll be okay hunny. deep breathe. smile in the mirror. and relax :) have a wonderful weekend! xo

PinkLouLou said...

This is why I love you! ha ha bless your heart. Sorry about your wrist sweets, I hope you start feeling better! xoxo

Tyly said...

You know I love you, which is why I have to tell you that I giggled just a tiny bit while reading! I know at the time it wasn't funny, but you are just too cute.

You made the RIGHT choice by tapping out!!! To keep going very well could have meant a serious injury.

I'm sorry about the fight with your friend. That can be extremely emotionally exhausting, and to pile everything else onto it? That's terrible.

Today is a new day, and it will only be much, much better!!!

Adrienne said...

Aww you poor thing! Don't you hate days like that?! When everything seems to go wrong no matter how hard you try to correct it? Hopefully today is a much better day for you! :)

The Mrs. said...

Those days are the worst, hopefully today and the weekend is just what you need! Hopefully you and your friend can work things out and your wrist starts feeling better!

Melissa said...

Hang in there, and I hope your wrist gets better soon!

Mrs. Nelson said...

I'm sorry you had such a rough day yesterday. You are right, everyone has bad days. You aren't alone! Today is a new day, and TGIF!!! I hope things with your friend work out, and that your wrist feels better. Sending a hug your way!

Jessica said...

Aww, hope today is better for you my friend! :(

Miss Chelsea said...

I had a rough day yesterday too... here's to hoping today is a little bit better

Rebekah said...

I think we've all been there, with the tears and full on hysteria. I hope today is SO much better for you. Rest up and relax. :)

ajs {of MN} said...

awe, love, feel better! it's never fun lettng ourselves go where i minds can take us to all the WHAT IFs...

make this a weekend for YOURself and relax, you will be ok.

i also had a pretty bad fallout with a GOOD friend that zapped all of my energy, this was almost 6 years ago- but it was for the best and i later realized that she was sucking all of my energy just being in a friendship with her.

it all works out in the end. have a good weekend! TGIF. xo

♥ Dani said...

Gosh, this and your scuba story (which I just went back and read) actually made me feel a little more normal. I think we ALL have days and/or meltdowns like those... hope today is better for you, take care of that wrist!

Neely said...

Cross fit is TOUGH! Thinking of you girl!

Miss Southern Vol said...

You sounds like what I feel like I have coming toward me after this week!! You poor thing! Take it easy :) Have a good weekend

everyone calls me bon bon said...

You need a rest every now and then, especially after such an emotionally draining day! I'm such the drama queen too, it's like I have to be super dramatic and get everything off of my chest and then the next day, (or the next hour), I'm happy as a clam again. Hope things with your friend can get resolved, that's always so tough! xoxo

Rissy said...

aw girlie! I am so sad for your bad day.
At least the friendship thing is something you can control, and ya'll can talk it out!

I cried to 3 of my college professors in the middle of a hallway one day when I incurred my 3rd injury in a row... I was a dance major! I needed all parts operating at full capacity. SOOO embarrassing but sometimes we all just need to melt down then build back up!

d.a.r. said...

Oh sweetie. I am so sorry. I hope today is better and that you have some time to unwind over the weekend.

Megan said...

i hope today went great for you!!!! and that your weekend rocks!!!

<3 megan

Veronica said...

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Alicia@ eco friendly homemaking said...

So sorry that you had a bad day. I pray that everything turns out well and that your wrist heals quickly. Sounds like you really have a great husband!I am new to your blog. Glad I found it!

Nel said...

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Stacey said...

Sorry that happened and I can envision every moment. For some reason the smiling in front of the camera must be a southern bell thing :-) Always gotta look pretty - and I must say - YOU DO!

Kelly said...

Awww, Amber!! Hope you and your friend have worked it out. But bless your heart, sometimes you just need to listen to yourself and take time out to chill. Hope things have turned around and your wrist is much much better!!

Kelly Marie said...

I hate days like that but I'm glad you have such a great hubby :) salt and vinegar chips are my kryptonite too =/

iheartvegetables said...

Hahahaha after this post, I read the scuba incident and it cracked me up. "This is calm?!?!" hahaha you must have a great hubby :)



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