Friday Confessional

So it's been a while since I've joined up for Friday Confessional - but I feel I'm feeling a doze of honesty this morning!  (Rissy this is the conffesional I link up with sometimes!)

I confess that I took a drug test this morning and I'm terrified that I might fail.  No....I'm not a drug user. In fact, I've never done drugs in my life.  I'm a little too paranoid for all the jazz.  But still...the anxious control freak in me is terrified that the lab might mix up my test results with someone else and my new company will pull my offer because I failed my drug test.  Yes...I'm the kind of person that worries about these things.  Plus...there were some *sketchy* looking people in the waiting room at the drug test center.  Oh and the name of the center I tested at is STD Testing Center.  (I kid you not!)  Fail.....

I confess that I'm a little emotional about today being my last day at my job.  I've had such a great 13 months here.  I've learned so much and been blessed with amazing mentors.  I've developed some true friendships.  It will be sad not to see these people everyday.  Despite the fact that I am thrilled about this new opportunity, I'm a little sad to walk away from my current employer.  I keep trying to remind myself when one door closes.....

I confess that I'm super nervous about my first day at the new job on Monday.  I've got my outfit picked out, got the quickest route to work mapped out, got my game face on - but still, I've never been great at change.  I have tried to kid myself my entire life that I can "roll with the punches" but the older I get the more comical that little white lie becomes. 

I confess that I do not have a perfect marriage.  GASP!  SHOCK & AWE!!! I know that comes as a surprise to many of you, but it is true, my marriage is not all rainbows and butterflies.  I feel the need to confess this for multiple reasons - mainly, just to be real.  I have had numerous conversations with bloggers lately ranting about those bloggers who just seem *so perfect*.  We all know the kind.  And I'm not judging them.  If anything, I'm jealous of them.  But I just truly wonder how some people can be so flawless.  Literally seems like rainbows and butterflies. 

After careful review of my blog, I realize that I tend to blog about the good stuff in my marriage and not the bad.  To be honest, I'm not a big fan of airing my dirty laundry for the world to see.  Also, there really is significantly more good than bad in my relationship.  Three years in and I'm still madly in love with this man.  He makes me laugh.  Makes me feel protected.  Makes me feel treasured.  I'm so blessed.

However, my marriage has it's imperfections, insecurities, and communication issues.  We don't fight often, but when we do, we bring the good stuff.  We often joke that we could sell tickets to our fights because they are definitely a "main event".  That's just a product of our personalities.  We are both incredibly passionate, emotional, quick tempered people.  We get pissed easily but we forgive even more easily.  It's a blessing and curse all in one. 

So there you have it.  I've been honest.  It may seem like rainbows and butterflies - but I've got my flaws.  I'm somewhat high maintenance and demanding.  I'm slightly neurotic and overbearing.  And I won't even get started on my husband's flaws.  :) :)  We aren't perfect - but we are 100% in love and committed.  That's as good as it can get folks!