Friday, February 4, 2011

Friday Confessional


I have a lot to confess this week - so *no* judging!

I confess that I am so happy to be blogging "full time" again.  I feel like I'm back to the old me.  It's as if the fact that I have the time to blog regularly signals that I've finally gotten this crazy schedule under control and that makes me!

I confess that I've got baby fever.  Yes, I want a baby.  Yes, I have a loving husband who will be an excellent father (honestly - he'll be a significantly better parent than me.)  Yes, we have supportive parents who cannot wait to be grandparents.  Yes I'm turning 26 in a month and hear my internal clock ticking.  But it's not the right time.  Oh how I wish it were. But it's not the right time.  I need to complete grad school and get my CPA cert - that's a two year process.  There are still things we want to do together before we commit to raising a child.  It's like my heart wants one thing and my brain knows it's not right.  I feel like for the first time in our lives Steven and I are making the responsible, well thought decision.  So we're sticking to it - my graduation present will hopefully be a baby.  Here's hoping these next two years fly by!

I confess that I bite my nails.  It's disgusting - but let me explain.  My nails look like this naturally.
I can bite my nails off down to the quick and in a matter of two weeks they will look like the above.  No special lotions, no meticulous regimen, no special nail polish - just super hard and long.  And I'm lazy.  Once they get to a certain length I need to trim them back because they interfere with my typing & workouts.  So I usually find myself mindlessly biting them off during a fit of anxiety.  I get stressed and realize that I need to take the time to sit down to clip & file my nails and the next thing I know - they are gone.  I have a feeling that moment is coming pretty soon.....

I confess that I'm a control freak.  Okay - so that's nothing new - but my controlling nature has hit an all time high.  Steven and I are keeping my little brother this weekend.  As a result, I'm probably not going to have time to do our biweekly grocery shopping (unless I take Ethan with me - which seems like a nightmare waiting to happen.)  Steven volunteered to do the grocery shopping for me.  Most wives would be thrilled - not me.  As soon as the suggestion escaped his mouth, my palms started to sweat and my heart began to race.  We are on a strict budget and I have an exact amount allotted every two weeks for groceries.  I have my grocery shopping down to an art form and I rarely go over budget.  Steven likes name brands - he swears by name brands.  I have this irrational fear that he's going to go shopping and come home having spent $100 more than allotted.  Apparently all these accusations were written all over my face because before I could even begin to object Steven said, "Amber - I'm a grown man. I can do the grocery shopping.  Just give me a list and I'll do it."  I could tell by his voice it was not up for discussion.

So I've made my list. may have the particular brand that I want him to buy - not just "mayo" but "Duke's Mayo" - not just "shredded cheese" but "Great Value shredded cheese".  And for items that I'm not exactly sure of the brand, I wrote a price beside them so he knows the range to stay within.  And at the top of the list in BIG BOLD letters I wrote the amount that he is allowed to spend.  He's gonna crap a brick when he sees this list.

But this is me trying to let go......

I confess that I skipped my 6am WOD (workout) this morning.  Again - allow me to explain.  Last night's workout was brutal.  A 20 minute AMRAP (As Many Reps As Possible) of 10 Push Presses, 10 Kettle bell Swings & 10 Box Jumps.  I did 10 rounds plus 12 reps - that's 110 push presses, 102 kettle bell swings & 100 box jump in twenty minutes.  And that was after a ten minute warm-up that consisted of 60 double unders (jump rope), 60 lunges, 10 push presses, 10 kettle bell swings & 10 box jumps.  And that was after my prewarm-up warm-up of 5 minutes on the jump rope & 300 sit ups!

By the time I got home last night - I could literally barely walk.  My calves have *never* burned like this before.  And when the alarm clock went off at 5am this morning (which was only 9 1/2 hours after my workout last night) I knew my legs couldn't take anymore.  Even though I know my body, in particular my legs, need a rest day today - I'm still pretty pissed at myself for skipping this morning's WOD.  I'm going to have to make this up on Sunday!

I confess that I'm happy it's Friday!!!

Hope you all have had a wonderful week and have an even better weekend!


Jennifer said...

WOW great confessions. Hope hubby going food shopping works out well.

Squirmy said...

I get baby fever about once a month (!) but now is really not the best time for me either, I have two years of grad school to finish up first too!

Good luck with the groceries :)

The Mrs. said...

I'm glad that you're back to blogging too :D I wish my nails grew that fast, I'm a nail biter too! :(

Have a good weekend

Rissy said...

Id say that was a workout that deserved to be skipped.

I confess that I am trying really hard to not engage in a facebook fight with a stranger... so I blogged about it lol

Miss Southern Vol said...

my nails could NEVER look that good- but Im a BIG stress nail biter too! I hit the baby fever moments too until I think about how much I enjoy sleep and relaxing :) Happy Friday!

Ashley said...

I'm like you -- our nails sound very similar. I anxiety nail bite or if I don't have a file haha =)

I have baby fever, though I don't like to admit it. J and I have made a 'plan' haha -- I know God is rolling his eyes at us ;) BUT we hope to have our first by the time I'm 28 (2 years from April) eek!! and then our second by the time I'm 30...we'll see!! it freaks me out to think about it though haha!

Happy Friday!

Rachel Murphy said...

great confession.. so jealous of your nails. I can only wish mine would look like that.

Sounds like taking a break from the workout was a smart idea.. you do want to be able to walk again :)

Have a great weekend.

Ashley said...

Good job on the workout last night, sounds like it was fantastic!!! I hate box jumps but love how they work and the kettlebells, oh how I love them. :) The pushups...not so much!

Babies are great and I wouldn't change a thing in our case, but if you have things you want to do, do them. Little ones are time consuming. :)

Jessica said...

I'm starting to think we're the same person... except you are BADASS at working out!

I have severe baby fever right now. Everyone around me is either pregnant or trying but I know it's not the right time for me. We'll see what the future holds!

Katie said...

hahahah I love what you did with the grocery list. I am literally the same. exact. way. I love to go grocery shopping and know exactly what items and the brand that I want and Billy is all over the board and I sometimes get anxiety. Too funny! Have a good weekend!

Aly @ Analyze This said...

OK! Your workout sounds brutal!!! Just brutal! But I soooo wish I could try CrossFit with you!

Baby Fever!! Come on two years! I want you to have a baby!!

Annnnd, I am so jealous that you can bite your nails and they will grow back out looking so nice! Ugh!

Meg O. said...

UM, yeah, you definitely had a good excuse to skip the workout this morning. That sounds extremely hardcore. You know your body best and when it needs rest, it really does! And btw, I'm glad you're back to blogging, too!

Rebekah said...

Baby fever is bad in our house. Bad, bad, bad. I have to trim my nails every week! They grow so fast! And, I love that you're back to blogging. I love it. :) Enjoy your weekend!

Neely said...

I confess that Im soooo glad you are blogging again!

Kaylee said...

I love that you are back in blogging mode :)

And I confess that I am the EXACT same as you when it comes to Jacob doing the grocery shopping. I get all worked up and avoid it at all costs if I can, but he wants me to trust him... I get terrified every time I even mention grocery shopping because I don't want him to offer to do it. I also put his budget at the top and a little start that says, "remember to track prices as you go."

Mrs. Newlywed Giggles said...

You are brave letting the hubs go food shopping on his own. Last time I sent my hubs out, I received five phone calls and he waas only getting five things. lol

everyone calls me bon bon said...

Haha! I'm sure your hubby will do great with the groceries:-) Your list is too cute. I totally bite my nails too, always have because I played sports all my life and I was always so anxious if I was sitting on the bench just watching. Lucky yours grow sooo fast! Ahhh, baby fever: I'm trying to hold off and get my baby fix whenever I can with my family/friends little bubbas!

I'm with you on the tough workout! Definitely listen to you body though and get that recovery time, then you can get back out there and get your butt kicked. Oh, the things we do:-) Happy Friday! xoxo

Kelly said...

WOW at the nails!!! I'm so jealous! My never grow, when they do they are brittle and UGLY.

Smart on the baby, I would take nothing for Cameron and I"m glad I had him when I did, but I understand where you are coming from.

Good luck with that list! LOL I'm not even going there!

Kelly Marie said...

I LOVE your confessions..I feel the same way about the first one! & your grocery list cracked me up haha

Mateya said...

Okay that grocery list thing is utterly ridiculous but oh so funny haha! Poor Steven. :)

I hope 2 years goes fast too because I can't wait for you to have a baby!!!!!

And your nails...woah! Mine have never and will never look like that. So jealous. And I don't know if I ever told you this before but your ring is just gorgeous and huge! Love it!

Morgan said...

I have an award for you on my blog!

Liv Kit @ Simply Sunshine and Daisys said...

Love your confessions. Sounds like me!

Greer's Gossip said...

These are great confessions!! I am glad you are back to blogging, I love your blog!! I am a new follower!!

Samantha said...

I left something for you on my blog :)



Mamarazzi said...

love your confessions. baby fever is a chronic condition around here, we have it BAD too!!

my nails grow crazy fast too, i use to bit them when i was a kid then my mom showed me a video of myself biting them...i looked like an


thanks so much for linking up, sorry i am late getting here, crazy couple of days!

Angel said...

Great post! I love your ring. It reminds me of my bff's. I call it her Mafia Ring :)

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