Wednesday, May 12, 2010

All About Me - My Marriage

Many readers want to know the intimate/juicy details of my life with Steven - so here you go.  Yet again - another long post - but you know me - I just love to type!

What is the most romantic thing you have done for your husband?
Steven isn’t exactly “Mr. Romance”. He does a good job of planning romantic evenings for me and surprises me with thoughtful gifts – but he doesn’t exactly enjoy it when I try to do the same for him. So to be honest, there hasn’t been a lot of “romance” on my end. Don’t guys think romance = black lacey lingerie? I have done many thoughtful things for my husband to show my love for him such as always making him a pumpkin pie for his birthday, spending hours making a scrapbook of his Senior season of football and doing my best to learn to cook his favorite meals.

Amanda from Trying My Best To Be A Proverbs 31 Woman wants to know
When do you guys want kids? any plans? and how would you plan to raise them?
If I had it my way, we would have three kids. I come from a large family and I would love to have a large family myself. If Steven had it his way, we would only have one. So we have decided to compromise and shoot for two (is it horrible that I’m praying for twins during the second pregnancy so I can get my three?)

Again, if I had it my way, we would get pregnant sometime next fall. I would be 26 and the baby would be born in the spring sometime around my 27th birthday. I would wait about 9-12 months and get pregnant again. I would really like to have given birth to both kids by the time I’m thirty – so I want to have them pretty close together.

Or Lord – how to raise our kids? Steven and I agree about the “important things” but tend to disagree about a few of the “little things” – like what to name them for example and what the rules will be if they are a boy or a girl (he plans to give boys complete freedom while our daughter will be locked away in a tower with a chastity belt until she’s 30 – I think that’s a little sexist if you ask me!) We definitely will raise them in a Christian home and with a strong understanding of the importance of family. Other than that – who knows. :)

PS - I will post some of my favorite wedding pics for you soon – this post is already long enough!

Same Sweet Girl asks
What are some of your favorite things that you and your husband do together???
SEC FOOTBALL!!! LOL We don’t exactly enjoy “hobbies” together. Steven hunts and golfs and I blog and run. So when college football season rolls around each year, we get super excited. We’re always up early each Saturday morning with Game Day at 10am and the schedule for the day mapped out. We try to tailgate for a few big games each year and host parties at our house. But even if no one else is around, we can sit on the couch together all day enjoying our favorite football teams and few beverages. It’s something that we can share and enjoy together. I absolutely love every Saturday during the season. I honestly don’t think Steven would have married me if I wasn’t so eager to share in his love for football. We have also agreed that I will not give birth during football season (as it also overlaps with hunting season!) So as you can see – we take it pretty seriously. :)

Ashton at Abundantly Blessed would like to know
What is the thing that draws you and Steven closer?
If you had asked me this question six months ago, I probably would have said “quality time together” or “SEC FOOTBALL!” – LOL. Over the past six months, we have joined FiveStones Church and really plugged in. We share life with four couples in our Life Group each week and as a result, our marriage has been affirmed in ways I cannot begin to describe. God is working in each of our lives in a palpable way and the closer we grow to Him, the closer we grow to one another. Growing up as a PK (preacher’s kid) I always heard “Christ should be the center of your marriage” – but over the past three months, that saying has taken on an entirely new and real meaning for us.

Rasha from And This Is What She Said ask
Best relationship tip?
Going back to my previous answer – I honestly would encourage anyone who longs to have a secure, committed relationship to center their relationship around their faith. It takes so much pressure off your marriage. Think about it – we are humans – humans with selfish desires, annoying tendencies and numerous imperfections. Then we go and date/marry another human who is also full of selfish desires, annoying tendencies and numerous imperfections. That’s a lot of selfishness, annoyance and imperfections! No wonder over fifty percent of marriages fail!

But when you allow Christ to become to focal point of you marriage – the pressure to please, to be perfect, to fulfill your partner completely dissolves. You learn to see your partner as Christ sees him – a sinner in need of love and forgiveness. As a result, it becomes so much easier to overlook the wet towels and dirty underwear he leaves laying around the bedroom floor and his horrible taste in hard rock music.

Again – I’m not a marriage counselor. But I do realize that marriage is tough – super tough sometimes. Throw every day struggles of paying the bills, cooking dinner & cleaning the house, raising kids & keeping the inlaws happy into the mix – and well that’s honestly a recipe for disaster if you’re relying on yourself to keep it together. Put the pressure on the Lord – He wants to carry your burdens and bless you and your relationship. You’ve just got to allow Him to do so.

Amber over at Goodnight Moon asks
I want to you fart in front of your hubs? Or are you still in the honeymoon stage?
If my Mema were alive, she would revoke my “Southern Woman” card for admitting this publicly – but yes, yes I “fluff” in front of my husband. (I like to refer to it as “fluffing” because it sounds much more feminine that way!) There are some things a woman should be allowed to do in the privacy of her own home – and I believe fluffing is one of them. And if my hubby happens to be in the same room as me when I need to fluff – well, he promised to love me “for better or worse” now didn’t he? I admire women who say they never fluff in front of their husbands – but that just isn’t for me. There is no way on earth I’m going to spend the next fifty years of my life giving myself a tummy ache just so I can keep an image of “femininity” in front of my husband. And he fluffs in front of me too – scratch that – he has man farts – and I’m okay with it. We keep it real in this house!

Hope you enjoyed reading my answers as much I enjoyed sharing.  Happy Hump Day - Come On Friday!


Katie said...

loved this sister! and AMEN on the way to keep your marriage strong. christ needs to be the center, not that it makes everything EASY, but it sure puts your focus on the right place!!!

and i don't "fluff" in front of my mister. i just can't do it. more because it embarasses me. but LORD does he ever let them RIP in front of me. ha.

Kelly and Sara said...

Very cute! I love finding out more about people so thanks for sharing. I don't know how people could never "fluff" in front of their man after they have been together for a long time! So hard to admit though :)

Aly @ Analyze This said...

Amber- I love how open and honest you are about your relationship with Steven. It gives me hope that there ARE great men out there :)

Alissa said...

You're too funny. I love how you called farting, "fluffing". I'm one of those who cannot fluff in front of my hubby haha. I just can't do it.

Sarah said...

Haha! My nephew calls farting fluffing too, but probably NOT because it's more feminine. =) I don't "fluff" in front of my hubby unless it's a complete accident. He grew up in a VERY modest home, and while it embarrasses me a little bit...he gets SUPER embarrassed when he "fluffs" in front of me. =) It's super cute.

Amen on the ways to keep your marriage strong. If more people realized that we're all sinners and our spouses are included in that...marriages would be so much less likely to fail. It breaks my heart.

Geezees Custom Canvas Art said...

You are too cute! I loved this post it was so honest and funny. I don't "fluff" in front of my hubby either.

Amber said...

Okay Ladies - you're making me feel very bad about fluffing in front of the hubby. Please tell me there is someone out there who does it too!

Amanda said...

great answers! can't wait to read more!

Same Sweet Girl: Memoir of a Southern Belle said...

Thanks for answering all of the questions so honestly and competely!! You are awesome! :)

My husband hunts too!! I begin to really miss him when hunting season rolls around! LOL

Mrs.Vid said...

Amber - I "fluff" in front of Adam and we're not even married yet. I figure he'd be better of knowing what he's getting into. We do live together and I believe in comfort in my own home too! You're not the only one!

Brittany said...

Fluffing - how cute are you?! I loved all of your honest and truthful answers :-)

Ryan said...

Very cute! I love finding out more about people so thanks for sharing.
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Mateya said...

You are so honest in your answers, I love it! Such great marriage advice!

Kristie said...

My husband and I call it a ricochet! And we definitely ricochet in front of each other! :)

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